Well, I know that my last post was pretty discouraging. But I'm doing really well. I talked to Wendy today on the phone (duh) and she said that everything is going well so far. She and Andy got her shelves put together along with her bed/couch. So that is actually big progress becuase I know it takes a long time to take that futon apart, so putting it together is quite the task as well. And she said she got all of the stuff out of her, which was a LOT. I'm happy she's there. I really do feel better, too.

School is going great. Umm.. not a whole lot to add there ..haha..

Well, this was just an update. It's getting late and I have a few things I still need to do before I hit the hay. Have a great Thursday everyone!!

Current Favorite CD: Caedmon's Call 40 Acres

"boo you whore" ...
quote of the evening, thanks to Michael .. sheesh.. I wish My Chemical Romance would have won something tonight at the VMAs just so he wouldn't be in such a sour mood.

So the weekend has been okay. I've been staying with the Wolfe boys. They're fun but exhausting - Ginger you're a top notch woman to keep up with these two. I can barely begin to fill your shoes in this position!!!

Tonight has been weird. Today has been Wendy's last day, technically, in College Station. I have been dreading it for a long time. I mean, it hasn't been horribly hard because it's been like two weeks since she first left. So it really feels like I've been saying goodbye for two weeks. I didn't even cry tonight when I gave her a hug and actually said good-bye. I did earlier and I can feel the water works starting up again .. ugh. I know that you read this Wendy, and I'm going to be selfish for a little bit. It sucks that she's leaving. How do you say goodbye to a best friend? I mean seriously.. I don't know. Like, I've said this before, but I never had true best friends in highschool, probably because most everything is fake in highschool. So now that I'm really having to say good-bye to another best friend (ginger too), life stinks. I mean, I know, truly know down deep that both of these women is going to a new and wonderful place. But I think it blows that I'm not going to see them for like 4 months at least. (and i love the fact that michael won't friggin go to bed..) Wendy's only a phone call or 3 hour plane ride away, and Ginger is only an email or blog away, but there's something that comes with "face time" as I like to call it. It's the animation in their faces, the tones and looks that I get, their hugs. I know it sounds all jacked up, but I don't know.. it's that face time I guess. It's watching Gilmore Girls on Tuesday nights, and Refuge on Thursdays, church on Sundays, going to eat at Wings and Double Daves - none of these will be the same.

I'm sorry that this is so depressing but it's how I feel and it's my blog, so I'll write what I want. . .

As I survey the ground for ants
Looking for a place to sit and read
I'm reminded of the streets of my hometown
And how they're much like this concrete
That's warm beneath my feet
And how I'm all wrapped up in my mother's face
With a touch of my father just around the eyes
And the sound of my brother's laugh
But more wrapped up in what binds our ever distant lives

But if I must go
Things I trust will be better off without me
But if I don't want to know
Life is better off a mystery

So keep 'em coming, these lines on the road
And keep me responsible, be it a light or heavy load
Keep me guessing with these blessings in disguise
And I'll walk with grace my feet and faith my eyes

Hometown weather is on TV
And I imagine thelives of the people living there
And I'm curious if they imagine me
They just want to leave
I wish that I could stay
But I get turned around
And I mistake my happiness for blessing
And I'm blessed with the poor
Still I judge success by how I'm dressing

So keep 'em coming, these lines on the road
And keep me responsible, be it a light or heavy load
Keep me guessing with these blessings in disguise
And I'll walk with grace my feet and faith my eyes

So I'll sing a song of my hometown
Breathe the air and walk the streets
Maybe find a place to sit and read
But the ants are welcomed company

So keep 'em coming, these lines on the road
And keep me responsible, be it a light or heavy load
Keep me guessing with these blessings in disguise
And I'll walk with grace my feet and faith my eyes

And I'll walk with grace my feet and faith my eyes
I'll walk with grace my feet and faith my eyes

Hey Hey Hey! Tomorrow is FRIDAY!! You know what that means... JEANS! hahaha

Well, this week has not been so bad at all. It's actually been pretty good. No big complaints. The students have been great for the most part and I'm learning a lot and making some headway with a lot of them.

Michael Wolfe is standing over my shoulder as I type this ... Haha..

This weekend I am staying with the Wolfe boys while their parents are out of town. We have some big plans .. hehe.. Tomorrow night we're gonna hang out and have a FEW friends over. This is not a party however. Just a movie night :o)

Then Saturday --- PAY ATTENTION TO THIS --- We're going out to dinner to celebrate Wendy! YAY! So 8pm at Koppe Bridge on Harvey. So if you're interested, please leave a comment. We're just meeting out there and then hanging there for a little while. But it's just a time to hang out with Wendy before she leaves. So please come out and hang with us!

So please continue to pray for Ginger and for Wendy as they are living and preparing to live in their new homes!

And pray a little for me too - still goin through some weird times, but I'm doing a lot better.

Love ya!

Wow - Good post Lauren - I really identify with this :

Is it possible for everything to really be going okay, but for some reason you just still feel all empty inside? thats what I have been kinda going through, and it is soo hard to explain, because...nothing is really "going wrong" but, I just dont feel complete...

You put it into words at near perfection.

I also used this phrase ... came up with it on my own..

How can my world be falling apart when things are just falling into place?

Just some thoughts from the bottom of the chili bowl

Gag. Kassie says I should update.. but really the only stuff I have to say is that things are goin okay. No complaints about the job other than trying to figure out what I have to wear everyday. . . I guess when there's more to say, I'll blog it.

Wow! Is it only Thursday?! It has been a great week! And tomorrow is Friday which means I get to wear JEANS!! Haha.. I never thought I'd be so excited to wear jeans... they're only my favorite piece of clothing next to t-shirts.

School has been good! The kids in our class are great. The first three weeks are going to be interesting simply because it's a different schedule than what it's going to be for the rest of the year because most of our kids are in work programs that haven't started yet. But it's all good. I did have one of our guys hit on me and is constantly asking me to be his girlfriend... It's so funny because I have a guy with a mental disability asking me out but I don't have any guys with a normal mental capability even considering me. .. Haha.. OH WELL .... I'll get over it.

Last night Kat and I went and helped Wendy do some packing which was fun and I'm glad we got to help her simply because she has so many clothes! It was good just to hang out and then we went to Shake's afterwards... instead of getting a shake I got ants in my pants :0) But it's all good.

Okay well, my lunch break is over!! I have to get back to work ... lol ....

“ For to me, to live is Christ and to die is gain. ”-Philippians 1:21

So the good news just keeps coming! I found out earlier in the week that I will get to do the coaching thing!! (reference an earlier post..) What an amazing blessing. It comes with a lot of boundaries but it's part of the job I guess.
All this week I've been doing inservice stuff at the school. It's been pretty good but I'm totally wore out athe end of the day. And yet somehow, I've been given the strength to hang out with friends. It's totally worth being dead tired the next day. I'm actually just dead tired now. Haha... I don't have a lot to add here today. School starts next week and I guess I'll be ready when I get there! Who knows what tomorrow brings...

Hebrews 6:15 "And so after waiting patiently, Abraham received what was promised." (bold mine)

Good and bad

Hey so if you haven't heard, I got a job!! Whoop! Yeah! I'm gonna be working in the Lifeskills room at the highschool in College Station. Basically, I'll be an aide, but I'm okay with that. I am just happy to have a job and to have some income coming in soon. I don't know if I was totally up front and honest with myself, because it is less than what I could have, but because I didn't work hard enough early on in the game, I am here. And I'm not going to look at it as being stuck here, but more as an opportunity to grow and learn. I'm looking forward to being in this environment and to get into the groove of how districts and schools actually work. Student teaching doesn't really show you that part.

... ... ...

I just thought of something really really sad. Wow. Ginger is leaving tomorrow. Gosh, that does not make me happy. I absolutely hate saying goodbye. We had breakfast yesterday morning (on Monday) and I couldn't say bye. I just had to say see you later... I mean, how do you say goodbye to a best friend? I've never understood that. I didn't feel this way at highschool graduation... probably because I didn't have close friends like Ginger and Wendy and Kat. It's one of the worst feelings ever.. How stinky.

I am going to miss you, Ginger, SO MUCH!! You bring me smiles all the time and even though I roll my eyes when you crack corny jokes or bust out in song, I envy your joy. Thank you for being so good and nice to me. Thank you for being an older sister to me and for caring so much and wanting so much for me. You are a true friend and you have such a caring heart. I will miss you so so much and I will definitely miss your quirks and fun habits that made me roll my eyes on the outside, but made my heart smile all the time.

Things just keep getting better tonight .. off to bed.

Wow. So everyone's blog is really sad. . . Ginger's is inspiring though. I guess it is a time of saying goodbye... But as Ginger mentioned, it's a time to start new. It's like going to college again, but this time, you don't have to take tests :) whoop for that. I dunno. I don't have a lot of words right now but know that this is hard for me too. It just hasn't hit me yet I guess...

Wow. So I was really pissed yesterday when I wrote all that. Apparently. Wow. I apologize for that! I am probably that pissed, but uh .. who knows.

Today was good fun. I went to lunch with Kat and Sara then headed out to the Smith house to get PAID and then over to the church. We worked so hard this afternoon/evening!! It was great fun just getting to work with people. Hung out with Will for a little while after that, then came home. Hey yall please pray for my mom, she is so stressed out this week, and I don't know why because I haven't been home at all. But she's super stressed, so please pray for her.

I am going tomorrow to Kemah with the youth group and then also to Galveston this weekend for my last youth trip. It's bittersweet! But I'm looking forward to a great time and LOTS of sunscreen!!

Keep praying for my job hunt!!

ugh . Gag me with a bowling ball.. I hate life right now .. not really life, just my life. Have you ever had the feeling of .. not having a purpose? Like, right now, living in CS, I have no purpose. I don't have any reason for being here. Or so it seems... That's how it always is, until 2 years later when you look back and see that, "hey i was there because this" ..... Like I'm just not doing anything. I hate that feeling. School doesn't start for me soon cause I'm not in school. And cause I don't have a job. So I don't have a job, so I don't have work to go to. And I'm almost done being a youth counselor because my time has come to an end there. (I know it's stinky, but it had to happen, so it is. Lauren, if you really want to know, you know..)
I hate that my friends are moving away. Not all of them, but quite a few. All but two of my college friends have moved. I have a few friends here and family. That's it. That is all that is tying me to this place. I have no other reason to be here which makes me want to leave so much more. I'm sorry if this is hard for you to hear, but it's harder for me to say.
Life is rough. Get some good shocks.